5 Reasons You May Have No Sex Life In Your Relationship

By | March 6, 2013

no sex life in relationshipIs your sex life dried up?  Do you feel that your partner no longer has the desire or need to be sexual with you?  You are not alone as researches say that 40 million American’s are in a sexless marriage, which is having sex less then 10 times a year.  You could be a little bit better off, maybe you are having sex twice a month. However, is that fulfilling your sexual needs?  An active sex life is good for your health both physically and mentally.  Sex burns off calories and is a great stress relief after a long day or night for both men and women.  For many men, it is the best way of showing their emotions physically with their partner.  For the most part men are ready to go at the drop of a hat while most women need to be “warmed up” first.  Here are some reasons as to why you may not have a sex life in your current relationship.

1. No Time For Sex

This is a common excuse or reason for having hardly or no sex at all in your relationship and a dangerous one.  If you do not or simply think you cannot make time for sex, then that means you are to busy to make time for your partner.  In my opinion this is a bad excuse for not having sex and a lazy excuse for both men and women to use.  Simply put, you need to make time for each other regardless or you run the risk of not having to worry about it because your partner may leave.  If you are not willing to make time for them, they may make time to leave the relationship and you all together.  Whether it is once a week and even for only 30 minutes to an hour, you need to make time for sex, the benefits out weigh the negatives and you will thank yourself in the long run.

2. You Do Not Like The Feeling Of Being Naked

This goes not just for women, but men also who feel embarrassed being naked around their partner.  After women have a child or the both of you get old, you may experience weight gain and your figure will change.  Yes exercise and a healthy diet can help a sexy figure, but for many that is not the case.  Emotions take over and some people are ashamed or embarrassed to be naked and have any sexual contact with their partner.  Your partner should love you for who you are, not what you look like now.  Yes most men would love to have that super model body on their wife or girlfriend and the women want a six pack and tone body on their husbands or boyfriends, however that is not realistic.  If you feel this is the reason why your partner is not interested in sex, sit down and have a talk with them.   Reassure them you love them for who they are and highlight everything you still find sexy and attractive about them.  This can help boost their confidence, which in turn can lead to more sex for the both of you.  Open communication and trust play key roles in getting through this problem for both of you, have patience and understand in helping your partner get back his or her self confidence.

3. My Partner Is Not Good

I think this is more of a problem women experience then men and a good reason why they would rather not have sex, it is not enjoyable for them.  Would you want to do something every week or more that you do not enjoy?  Chances are no, this is why many women just avoid sex all together.  The same thing can go for men though as well, not all females are good when it come to sex either.  Does he last only a minute or two?  Does she just lay in bed and not do anything?  I am sure you can come up with a list of your own as to what problems you have with your partners sexual performance and it is actually a good idea to do just that.  Sit down and talk with each other on what problems you have and what can be done to help resolve them.  This is also a great time for the both of you to talk about what pleases you the most and what is a turn off.

4. Depressed and Not In The Mood

Depression is a serious problem and needs to be handled as it effects more then just one person, it can cause problems for your partner or the entire family.  Sadly it also leads to a low sex drive or no sex drive at all.  Everything in life feels like it is crashing down, you just want to stay locked in your room or house and not do anything.  Physical touch either has no effect on you or makes you sick to your stomach.  Being in the mood is a rare thing and depression can be the main cause if you always feel this way.  You need to consult with a doctor first in order to find out the right steps you need to take to not only get your life back on track, but your sex life as well.

5. I Like My Sex Toys Better

For women this can also sit next to #3 as you get more pleasure from your toys then you do your man.  With sex toys you can control everything, even the time to start and the time to stop, where you like it and how fast or hard.  You get no complaints before, during or after pleasing yourself, they are easy to clean and get put away for another day.  You think it is a win win situation for you, but in fact it can be killing your relationship with your partner.  Have you ever thought of letting your partner use the sex toys on you?  This can help elevate your mood and his sexual desires at the same being able to please you first before sexual intercourse even begins.  You may like your toys better, but you may end up liking him using the toys on you while he plays with you at the same time even better.


One thing to remember is sex is seen as being important in a relationship by both men and women of all ages.  No sex in the relationship or hardly any at all can lead to a lot more problems for the two of you then you had thought about.  Find out the reason or reasons you are not having any sex in your relationship and come to an agreement on what you can do to help one another.  Sadly though, for some people not having sex or only having sex once a month is not enough and they may leave it for someone who is willing to be more affectionate and sexual with them.

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